I'm sure on many occasions, your mates will insult you, either with good reason or for no reason whatsoever just for shits and giggles. I used to try and reply with some sort of witty comeback.
Recently I've found a clever (and also stupid way round this). What I've discovered is the phrase "So's Yer Face", meaning when someone calls you a name or gives you an insult, you respond with "So's Yer Face".
Let's create a real world example. My mate Walford may occasionally call me an "Assmonkey" and instead of me thinking of anything special, I instantly reply with "So's Yer Face". This causes great confusion and disaray in my friends mind and also makes him feel upset as he managed to come up with a somewhat "clever" insult and I come back with such a "clever and mindboggling" response, he's not sure when to go with it.
You can also create further confusion by waiting until someone mentions something normal like "I don't like pizza" and you say, "So's Yer Face". Or for an even better result, you do a witty adaption and say "Your face doesn't like pizza".
Anyway, I'm a complete idiot but also possibly the founder of quick social confusion.
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